Vulnerability and the lived experience

Vulnerability and the lived experience

I focus on the lived experience because I don’t think people, things, and places become relatable until you genuinely experience them in real-time.  We currently live in a very picturesque world, and I see so many people trying to get the perfect picture to prove to the world that they have experienced something.  However, nothing trumps the experience, and it often cannot be relayed in the ideal image.  In the lived experience, you must be vulnerable, and a perfect picture does not show that experience.

Being a flight attendant exposed me to so many different people and experiences.  I remember people questioning my choice to be a flight attendant.  How could I spend four years in college to earn a bachelor’s degree and become a “waitress in the sky?”  The 23 years I spent traveling the world gave me more experiences than college ever could in hindsight.

I grew up in an immigrant family, and many of my early experiences came from being an immigrant.  As a child immigrant to the US, I remember not wanting to be different and accepting the vulnerability of being different.  As a young adult, I knew that my experiences were viewed differently and were unlike those of my peers, and it took me several years to learn to lean into my uniqueness.

When I first became a flight attendant, it was a time of genuine customer service and being “something special in the air.”  Flight service included champagne and caviar service, and it would take almost two hours to complete a dinner service with cooked-toorder onboard chateaubriand.

Vulnerability is admitting that the first time I had chateaubriand was on an airplane.  It was also the first time I had caviar, and I had been serving caviar for almost two years before I had the nerve to try it myself.  My regret is not having tried it on day one! However, I did not want to be vulnerable and try it in front of my coworkers.

But that was my vulnerability, and I learned through my lived experience that holding on to the vulnerability of not admitting my naivety was only to my detriment.  As airline services reduced year by year, I longed for the days of caviar and champagne service.  It’s an experience few will ever get to experience, and I had the opportunity to experience it daily and didn’t for many years.

What are you giving up by holding on to your vulnerability?  I promise you that the lived experience is much better than the picture opportunity.  Live and be proud of your firsts, because they will not be your lasts.  Have you been in vulnerable situations and learned from them? I’d like to know.

Fall travel

Fall travel

Fall is a great time to travel. Leaves are changing colors, and it can be an excellent time for a road trip.  However, the weather can be a bit unpredictable, and temperatures can drop unexpectedly. Here are a few ideas to consider as we head into the fall if travel is in your future.

Packing light.

Packing for a fall trip can be a bit tricky.  Sweaters, hoodies, and jackets can be bulky to pack.  One way to pack light is to think of dressing in layers. Layering long sleeves, vests, button-down shirts, and jackets make it easier to take on or off and adjust to weather changes.  In addition, varying different items can refresh outfit choices leading to packing less.

Be prepared for weather changes.

Fall weather can be unpredictable so prepare for rain or sunshine. An umbrella or poncho will often come in handy.  However, sunscreen and sunglasses might also be necessary.  Mornings are usually cool and crisp while the afternoon warms up.  In addition, rain is often in the forecast.

Off-peak deals.

Fall travel is much less hectic than summer travel as many destinations are much less crowded.  In addition, fall can be one of the cheapest times to travel, and prices on airfare, hotels, and activities tend to be lower. Food also tends to be more affordable as fall festivals and seasonal changes in food make fall dining an incredible experience.

More hotel perks.

The hotel industry tends to slow down in the fall season.  There are far fewer crowds, so hotels and other places offer more perks to attract business.  It is easier to receive hotel upgrades, and hotel points go further than in peak season.  Hotel staff is usually more attentive as they have fewer guests to serve, so the service tends to be better.

Fall sickness.

Temperature drops, more rain, and humidity tend to increase people’s risk of getting sick. Due to the change in weather, fall is often a time many people experience colds and cases of flu.  This trend, along with the realities of Covid, means fall travelers should be more careful of fall sickness and try to stay as healthy as possible. Getting more exercise and sleep is a great way to enjoy a fall vacation while maintaining your health.

Do you have any plans for fall travel?  I’d like to know.

My inner journey.

My inner journey.

Being a mother is a never-ending travel experience. Just like taking an actual trip, preparation is vital! My recent journeys have been a bit different as I felt like my travel and motherhood journey was at an end. Yet the reality is that it is still at an inflight stage. Covid19 became part of my reality in 2020, and I could no longer consider myself an empty nester. Even though my children are in their 20’s, I immediately felt the mothering phase kick in; are you well, taking care of yourself, wearing masks, social distancing, and the like. I will always be a mother, but after becoming an empty nester, I lived my life as such, and so was an absent but present mother.

My oldest has graduated college, started a career in the USAF, and became a homeowner at 23 (shameful humble brag). My youngest is in her senior year of college and is doing well in her social and school life. She attends the number 1 HBCU Spelman College (prideful plug), responsible enough to have been a resident advisor, scholarly enough to be on the honor roll, and social enough to be on several school boards and activities.

2020 came, and the Covid pandemic was apparent.  My youngest had to leave school in Atlanta, a ten-hour ride from our home in Texas. I am an empty nester, was +24 hours away on another continent. All I could do was advise. “Pack up the car and drive safely,” I said. For the next six months, I remained in Asia while my baby girl lived at home alone. The choices we made were heart-wrenching and although I constantly checked in, not being there was very difficult, so my “inner” motherhood travel journey began. Was I a bad mother? Should I be with my grown daughter instead of my husband? What were people thinking of me?  Should I travel back home?

I have been home in Texas for a year now, and another inner journey has begun; am I a bad wife? Should I be with my husband? What is the right choice?  How do I feel?   What I do know from my lived experiences is that self-care and self-love are essential! We must acknowledge the inner journey. I live my life between two continents, North America and Asia, so my journey has to continue.

What will my next journey be like? I’m not sure, but what I do know is that I will share it with you, so keep following for more.  Let’s take this journey together.

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Summer ready?

Summer ready?

As a travel blogger, I’m hearing more and more of the term “summer ready.” I tend to ignore this phrase. For me, this phrase carries an underlying message of a particular type of body to have during the summer months. This message tends to put pressure on people to change their bodies during the summer months. Just as there is no perfect time to travel, there is no ideal body to be had for the summer. Here are a few ideas on accepting yourself as you are and being summer/travel-ready anytime.

There is a range of summer clothing and swimwear, and there is also a range of body types and sizes. Find people and sites to follow that allow you to feel accepted and empowered. In my recent travels to beach destinations, I find comfort in seeing the variety of body shapes and sizes and comfortable people in their skin. Know that no two people are the same and enjoy the skin you’re in.

Acknowledge the why behind advertising and marketing. For example, brands are trying to sell their products. So they focus on who they think will purchase the products being sold. Acknowledge that everything you see is not for you and focus on what you believe represents you. When you become more focused on yourself rather than the product, you become more aligned to accepting the body you have over the body you want.

Embrace body positivity. Traveling allows us to recognize the vast differences in cultural norms. It also reinforces that what some see as beauty in the body can be different from what others perceive. But, again, we must realize the role marketing plays in what we are meant to assume is the perfect body image. Do not allow others to affect your enjoyment of the summer months based on their perceptions.

Recognize that your body is not seasonal. The same body that takes you through winter and fall is the same body that takes you through spring and summer. We are constantly growing and changing. If you feel the need to change your body at any time, feel free to do so. However, we should never feel pressured to pursue an exterior body standard. Instead, stay healthy and happy and focus on loving yourself as you are.

Do you feel pressure to have a summer body? If so, why? I’d like to know.

Travel souvenirs.

Travel souvenirs.

I’ve spent more than half of my life traveling.  Through the years, I have amassed my share of travel souvenirs.  My collection has ranged from T-shirts, magnets, coffee mugs, keychains, art, and furniture.  Having also lived as an ex-pat, moving with your collection of souvenirs can be a hassle.  Now I prefer a photographic memory or a small trinket that evokes special memories.  Here are my thoughts on travel souvenirs.

You can find magnets almost everywhere you travel.  For novice travelers, they can be a great souvenir from your travels. They can also be a great way to keep track of all your destinations.  However, magnets can soon overwhelm the spaces you are displaying if you are or become a prolific traveler.

Destination coffee mugs are another excellent travel souvenir.  However, they are fragile and take up a bit more room when packing. Like magnets, they can also become overwhelming as you can only use them sparingly.  Choosing your morning coffee mug often becomes a chore when you have so many choices.

T-shirts are one of my favorite travel souvenirs, and I still collect them everywhere I go.  Like magnets and coffee mugs, they too can become overwhelming.  However, I have started creating T-shirt blankets and throws.  These allow me to keep the memories the tees invoke close to me in a much more visible way.

Art is a great souvenir, but getting it home can be a challenge.  As a souvenir, art requires much more thought than handheld souvenirs.  It usually has to go with your home décor, and you need space for display.  Packing art to carry home can also be a challenge as it often does not fit into your luggage, so transporting it can be a hassle.

Furniture is a great way to bring memories of a place with you.  As a travel souvenir, however, like art, it is a thoughtful investment.  Furniture usually requires shipping to your final destination, and often the costs can be prohibitive.  But it will be a cherished memento that you will have for many years.

Whether a novice or expert traveler, I encourage everyone to grab a travel souvenir. It not only supports but can be a great way to keep your travel memories alive.  Do you collect travel souvenirs? What are they? I’d like to know.

Road trips.

Road trips.

Covid realities are still a concern for many.  As many now contemplate travel, the option of a road trip can be an excellent choice for travel.  Road trips enable a bit more control over social distancing than air travel. So, whether for a quick weekend getaway or a weeklong trip, here are a few ideas to consider.

On a road trip, the traveler is in total control of the itinerary. The departure and arrival times of the trip are flexible, and you are free to take as many or as few stops as necessary. Overall, traveling by car gives freedom and flexibility not offered by other travel options.

You can pack as much or as little as you desire.  There are no weight limits for your luggage. Therefore, you can carry items you may not have the luxury of carrying on an airplane or ship.  However, I would strongly suggest keeping your valuable things out of sight and not exposing yourself to possible theft.

Even though a road trip will add mileage to your car, the costs are often a much better option than airplane tickets.  Considering the price of gas and having more hotel options can be a much more affordable way to travel and see the country.

Planning out a road trip is essential, especially for the driver.  Fatigue is a genuine concern, and the driver takes on a big responsibility with having passengers in the car.  A good playlist, audiobooks, and podcasts are great ways to ease the boredom of a road trip.

There are many benefits of a road trip. Road trips offer a lot of time for self-reflection.  They provide an opportunity to try something new and to find inspiration from the surroundings you pass through.  Additionally, road trips can provide a break from social media and a great way to make memories with family and friends.

Have you taken a road trip recently?  Did you like it, or do you prefer other methods of travel?  I’d like to know.